Photo Courtesy of Pixabay.com
I was about 50% through writing Zero Magenta when the UK Channel 4 launched "Humans". The story of advanced robots "waking up". At first I was nervous that I might copy some of the story line, even subconsciously, but I needn't have worried. Humans takes a more traditional view and throws in enough cliches, plot holes and enough bad science to sink a battleship.
I hate being negative about another writer's work, they were clearly aiming high, and I really wanted to like the series, but it annoys me more than it entertains. Sorry.
I've long been disappointed by how we use our technology in such banal, trivial ways. A modern smart phone has more computing power than an entire room filled with computers back in the 1970s. So what do we do with this modern marvel? Maybe we join all these computers together to find the cure for cancer, maybe we can plot the course to Mars and build a working EM Drive, or maybe we just bring all the people together to stop all wars. Nope! We play Candy Crush, post cat videos on YouTube and brag about the Skinny Latte we've just enjoyed at Starbucks on Facebook.
This is the reality of technology in the 21st Century. It came to me when my wife and I went to Dinner with some friends, and their son was playing with an iWatch. Our Shiny Technology is just a toy.
New advanced AI robots wouldn't be working in our factories, or helping in complex surgery or engineering. They would be expensive baubles that we could impress our friends with. Somebody to play Candy Crush with. They'd be purchased by the same taste vacuums who buy Lamborghini's and Bugatti's.
So back to Humans. What's wrong with it? SPOILER ALERT.
We'll let's start with the good. One story line stands out above all the other. Series 2 Episode 5: We learn that the character of Renie pretends to be a robot (or Synth) because her father doesn't care about her. She's hiding behind another character. It's a fantastic story element, I only wish I'd thought of it myself. There are a few other flashes of brilliance, but they're drowned by the cliches and bad science.
First there are the cliches:
- Mad scientist embeds an "awakening" code in a few of his creations
- A young hacker can apparently rewrite the most complicated computer code ever created.
- The "Father" in the family unit is an idiot.
- Synths are the most complex, technologically advanced creations in history, but people still drive around in old petrol powered Saabs.
OK, there's not too many. It's the bad science that really makes me rage. Of course Humans is not the only TV show to talk down to its audience, but I was hoping for much more.
Bad Science:
- The laptop I'm writing this on, gives out a lot of heat. Now imagine how hot a full sized robot would become. Apparently no-one notices when they touch one.
- They would be very, very heavy. Even using the lightest weight materials and batteries they would still weigh twice as much as a human. Again nobody seems to notice. They would also make an audible servo sound, It might be quiet but you'd still hear it in close proximity.
- Any of the Synths are capable of "waking up". What? So the company that engineers these products decides to put in a processor with 10 times the required processing power just in case the Synth develops AI? I've worked in Industry long enough to know that most products are under engineered.
- They can be recharged with a mobile phone charger. Err Nope! A standard USB port can charge at up to 1.5 Amps. With the gigantic battery required for a synth, that means it would probably take at least 24 hours for a full charge. Furthermore, the high power drain would require a charge every few hours with such a low charge rate.
- When a synth wakes up (E.g. the bloodthirsty Hester) they can remember nasty things done to other standard Synths and they become angry about it. That's akin to a Robot becoming self aware and feeling sorry for a toaster.
- The software code in a synth is like the holly grail even though it was created by a well trained software engineer using a standard code language. So complex that only a school girl can understand it.
- Any synth can be hacked using a windows tablet PC. Nope! An advanced AI would need to be running a very high speed RTOS (Real time operating system). A simple USB port would not give access to all the running code. It's also unlikely that conventional code would be sufficient for an AI of that capability.
- When the evil corporation finds a woken Synth, they can't find out what's special about it to create others. WRONG! If they really are just running code, all they need to do is download it and read it! Apparently this simple debugging technique is abandoned in the future.
- Last but not least (and this one is also a cliche), Robots will replace everyone in every job. If that did happen, nobody would have enough money to buy anything made by these Synth armies and the global economy would crash. Maybe Human's is set before that realization, but the idea that Robots will replace us all is nonsense.
Well there it is. You may agree or disagree. I'd be interested to hear if you have any of your own thoughts. Or maybe you don't care and enjoy it because it has a cute cast.
Bladerunner it isn't.
Enough ranting for now.
Cheers,
John Howes.
